Turning

It wasn't a great day at school today. Really. It's nothing to do with anyone or anything that happened, but rather, it's one of those days where something just hits me and it lasts the whole day. In short I think it's time to move on again.

I live my life looking for new challenges, new heights to scale, and once I've surpassed that, I look for something new. It's the acknowledgement that life is transient and what we have and possess is fleeting.

There's only so much you can push the boundaries and break the stereotypes formed of people. There's only so far you can go with a person, then when all's been said and done, we move on. But thinking about it, it's been far too short. The challenges just came and past, and (perhaps) it's over.

But if that's it, then I'm losing the beauty of living each day and loving it, knowing it's a new day with new experiences, and to embrace the joy it brings. I'll be losing out on living life to the fullest, and enjoying the company of those around me. It's true; I'm losing trust and faith in relationships, which can so evidently be seen in my recent withdrawal from a good many built up over the past few years. There are so very few in the world that affirm you for what you do right, instead of your flaws. There are even fewer who would walk you through the darkest periods of life and ensure you do survive and come out of them a better person.

For so long I've believed in singularity; in the self. Could I be wrong? Am I now forced to accept that there is space for the Other(s) in my life? When I'm close to giving up, you just prove me wrong time and again.

I need a break from all this thinking. Strangely enough I've just thought of another post, but that'll wait till later.